Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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