i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
