You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Yo dont text me then not text me
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize