Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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