Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
