You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
