Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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