No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Randomize
