Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
