...so i touched it.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
