Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
is it fun? or sober?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize