i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize