Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
