wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
