Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
