So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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