FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize