so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
do herpes really smell.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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