I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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