R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Sext me about skeletons
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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