4 words: hood of his car
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
