But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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