So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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