Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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