I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
