I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
