I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
