How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I wish you could order shots online.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
