walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
