I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
