He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
