girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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