how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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