Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
