I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize