can u get pink eye on your cock?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
