I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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