I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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