i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
