# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Randomize
