playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize