Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
