32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
