just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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