Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I have feelings that need drinking.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
