i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
