Screwed.edu
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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