im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize