yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
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