The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
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